7 pieces of moving advice that can help you gently connect with your new town, and allow your curiosity to override your anxiety.
Dear Reader, a move to a new city can be exciting and fun, the wind in your sails! A move is a great opportunity to discover more about who you are and what you’re capable of. But it can also feel scary, nerve-jangling and downright lonely. Whatever the reasons that have brought on this move, know that you can get past the initial discomfort and really love your life and where you live.
Moving Advice #1:
Do a “Welcome-Connection Ceremony” with your new land.
Establish a personal relationship with your new land. You will feel this connection wherever you go and whatever you do! The more you connect with the land, the more you will fall in love with it, like a friend and even like a lover. Read how to do a Welcome-Connection Ceremony here.
Moving Advice #2:
It’s OK to Mourn Your Old Life (for a little while).
A move to a new city is a big change. HUGE! Your routines are disrupted. You feel lost. And your best friends and favorite places are no longer there to soothe you.
It’s ok to feel sad. We are taught to be positive all the time, but sadness, regret, and loss are all legitimate feelings that we need to recognize and honor within us.
Identify the Sadness
If this move is bringing up a lot of sadness and regret, chances are something in your past needs to be forgiven, released and healed. Is it a relationship that has ended? The loss of a job? A transfer of some kind? It’s important to do your inner work and find the root cause of your sadness.
It may take a while for you to start feeling better. That’s ok. Focus on being kind and gentle with yourself as you go through this transition. And in the meantime, start sticking your toe in your new life, little by little. You may be surprised how the “newness” of it all helps to heal your wounds with time. As you explore your new city and life, you will simultaneously help with the healing process.
(If you need help with the healing process, a tarot reading is a great place to open up the conversation and figure out what needs light. This can be done from the comfort of your home. Click here for more information. )
“If we can just let go and trust that things will work out the way they’re supposed to, without trying to control the outcome, then we can begin to enjoy the moment more fully. The joy of the freedom it brings becomes more pleasurable than the experience itself.”
― Goldie Hawn
Moving Advice #3:
Start New (Better) Routines
According to Gretchen Rubin, author of The Happiness Project, who writes about happiness, habits and human nature, “Moving to a new home is a rare opportunity to build good habits and break bad habits.”
For ideas and practical guidance on establishing routines, read this article: https://theempresswoman.com/5-ways-establish-routines/)
If you’ve been wanting to start an exercise routine or try a new form of exercise, moving to a new place is a great opportunity to implement a new workout routine. You may discover a great gym close to your new place or a pilates or yoga studio you’d love to check out.
Perhaps now you have that extra space in your apartment to set up for a morning meditation routine or yoga practice. Seize the moment.
Moving to a new place is also a great time to pursue a hobby you’ve had on your bucket list, such as gardening, jogging, acting in local plays or knitting. This, in turn, could be a great opportunity to meet new people who share your interest. Do some research and you will be surprised and what you find that will excite you.
Moving to a new city is a great time to learn something new. If you have just moved to a new city you may not have a lot of friends to go out with yet. You may find yourself home alone on a Saturday night – and depending on where you live, it might be cold, rainy or a bit off the beaten path.
This is a perfect time to learn that thing you’ve been wanting to learn.
Now with online learning, you can learn absolutely everything and anything, very well and very affordable. Examples are How to Day Trade, How to Build a Blog, How to Sew, How to Cook, How to write scripts for Television, How to Paint.
You will feel excitement at learning what you’re passionate about, and your new knowledge and excitement will help boost your confidence and give you something to talk about when you do get out there to make new friends.
Continuing education classes at the local community college are also a great option.
Moving Advice #4:
Get Lost On Purpose
Everything is new. The shops, the restaurants, the parks. Go out, with no agenda but to get lost. You never know what gems you will find just down the street or around the corner – the greatest antique store ever, a gourmet shop, a coffee shop with wifi you didn’t know was there, a hidden, little park. Perhaps you will discover a yoga studio, a cool restaurant or a perfect jogging path.
Getting lost stimulates your brain, gets your adrenaline flowing, challenges your comfort zones and raises your confidence. Not bad for getting lost!
Moving Advice #5:
Wifi is Your New Best Friend
Friends & Family are Just Fingertips Away
With today’s technology, family and friends are just fingertips away. A simple text or a quick chat can really soothe the nerves and inch you away from the metaphorical edge. Chats with friends and family can be the remedy you need to start getting your bearings again. It’s also a great outlet for you to vocalize your feelings and get them out in the open. Anxiety is usually less scary when we talk about them than when we keep them internalized.
Wifi @ Home
Besides connecting with friends and family, use wifi to:
Listen to your favorite music (and dance, dance, dance alone in your living room).
Read a book online
Watch your favorite movie or show on demand
(While I was going through my transition of living alone in a new city after a divorce, I found a lot of comfort watching “Army Wives” on Netflix. The characters became my new friends. There were a lot of tearful episodes as well, and I think the crying did me good too.)
Listen to audiobooks, podcasts, TedTalks and YouTube channels.
(Podcasts are also fun. I liked listening to “The Splendid Table“, a cooking podcast, as I unpacked boxes and figured out where the dishes and pots would go. It wasn’t too cerebral that I needed to pay close attention, but light and enjoyable enough to keep the spirits up.)
Order a favorite food or delectable treat online – why not? In the mood for Indian? Sushi? Go ahead and treat yourself.
Do exercise on demand
When I moved to a new city by myself, I was grieving from a divorce. I didn’t know anyone except new associates from work. I spent a lot of time doing online yoga. I helped me so much on so many levels. There are lots of free yoga routines available online.
(On another note, as I mentioned, I also binge-watched sappy shows on Netflix and on occasion made homemade margaritas) Balance, my friends.
Moving Avice #6:
Use Your Passions to Make New Friends
Moving to a new place is a great opportunity to meet new people and make new friends.
Check out a place where you will find like-minded people that share your interests and hobbies.
If you’ve never tried meetup, I totally recommend it. There is a meetup for almost anything you can think of or you can start a group yourself! Go ahead, browse through.
Your Local Library
An Art Class
Craft classes at a local Michaels or JoAnns Store
A Parenting Class
When my son was born, I was a first-time mom, caring for my son all day while my husband was at work in a new city we had recently moved to. I felt anxious that I didn’t really know what I was doing, so I signed up for a local parenting class. There I met another mom going through the similar struggles and joys of a first-time mom. We became friends and slowly our little mom group began to expand. We started a WhatsApp mom’s group and it was one of the best things that ever happened to me. We are all still friends years later. Some of us have moved away, but we are still just a text or phone call away. We ask each other questions, share our joys and struggles and support each other. Plus, many of these moms were also not local, so we discovered the area together.
Moving Advice #7:
Start Becoming a Local
Local Facebook groups –
Check if your area has any local facebook groups. These are great resources for people promoting events (events you might be interested in), asking for and/or recommending services (like the best hair salon, yoga class or car mechanic) and selling things you might need, like a cute side table for your new place.
I joined a women’s running group through a facebook group page I discovered. The description said it was a very casual running/jogging/walking group, really a group for women to get out, move, socialize and make new friends. I woke up early one morning to attend. I met a lady there, we walked/jogged together and talked and talked. Turns out we have so much in common. We have since hung out many times after, going to a concert, on a hike, and over for coffee. She is health-oriented (I met her in a jogging group!) – so she is a good influence too. We talk exercise, healthy cooking, but we still enjoy a glass of wine together too.
Stalk your new town! What events are going on or coming up that make you feel giddy with excitement to check out?
Is there a restaurant, coffee shop, or bar that makes you feel giddy to discover?
Go check it out!
Or better yet, invite a new friend to join you.
A new move is stressful. No doubt about it. But it is also exhilarating and transformative.
Take it one step at a time. Listen to your heart and follow what brings you joy and excitement.
Remember, you are never alone. Every day is a new day with endless possibilities for joy, happiness, and self-discovery.
You are blessed! Enjoy your life – the ups, the downs and all.
What’s something that has really helped you settle into your new place? Please share it in the comments below!